XEROPITTURA

Post-Elitism And Romance

If you've read my articles, I think I made it clear that I love very few things and that I've never had a very

considerable marking romantic relationship in my life. But in this article, I'll tell you about my love life.

My love life started very early, as I was 11 years old and having crushes on androginous boys and girls I saw

both Tumblr and Facebook (before Meta ruined it) and all I could think of was how I wish I had someone by my

side who wouldn't be a complete jackass regarding my wishes and accomplishments. But for some reason, until I

completed 21 years of age, all the people I got involved with romantically treated me as some sort of competitive

challenge they had to endure. Meaning that none of my personal achievements or feelings were treated as something

serious, but it was rather seen by my partners as a matter of who's feeling the worst. Wich also meant that my

sadness was a good sign they were in control and that my trips or commercial achievements were rather a threat

to their lives than an opportunity to grow together with me. Now, we'll talk about my ex girlfriend, Lizzy.

Lizzy was a girl I dated for almost a year, we met for the first time on a facebook group dedicated to a weird

dude some youtubers and trolls used to bully for the sake of doing something remarkable. I remember that, at the

time, I was very much into chicago rap and other bloghaus-era music, so that alone meant I was into a very and

uniquely introverted vibe. But then I met Lizzy in the same group, she started interacting with the memes I was

posting, I thought she was a funny girl and then, after a day, we added each other and started having some sort

of friendship wich then developed to be a crush and a reason to have a relationship as soon as we could.

At the same time, my best friends started noticing a pattern that this girl had and, to be short on it, she was

basically a younger Jodi Arias. Same face, same romantic beliefs and feelings, same everything. So it was no

surprise that she rapidly started making me drift away from my best friends and also family members, as well as

forcing me to stop doing everything that I loved (music, photoshop, college, working, brushing my teeth, you can

think about it) and that pattern wasn't so visible for me because I honestly thought she was insecure. I mean,

wouldn't you, an introverted person, be insecure about dating someone who's had close friendships with people in

the same circle as Charli XCX, Jack Donoghue and Sky Ferreira had? Be honest, me and you would at some extent.

Lizzy hated me but I never noticed. I loved this girl more than anything and, at times I found myself crying at

random moments of the day when I thought about how much I loved her. I loved planning our future, our marriage,

our life together. But then, things went north for me and south for her: I found a new job, a new chance to get

more money and center myself back where she lived, and in the overall, everything was nice. Except that she was

either way too attached to me because she couldn't bear being distant from me, or she was in fact, mad that I

was doing great and perfoming good outside of her sight. Wich you can guess, annoyed my best friends. And even

worse, but the girl who was my ex girlfriend at the time didn't accept it very well.

From what I discovered, both my best friend Jennifer and my ex girlfriend Leonina "united" without my knowledge

to spy on Lizzy. They spent weeks on end watching both my conversations, interactions and hers. It didn't take

too long for them to discover that the girl I was dating was so good at manipulating narratives, that I only had

the thought about evilness 7 months after we broke up. I mean, I'll be honest and say that I should've taken it

more seriously when her mom told me that Lizzy was manipulative. Yeah, her MOM said her daughter was manipulative.

One day after the Leoniffer investigations, Leonina rushed into the apartment I was living at the moment and

started an argument about how she woulnd't let anyone hurt me. I was a little surprised by the visit and kindly

asked her to go away and, as a good victim, I started defending Lizzy, wich annoyed Leonina even more. After a

few minutes, the argument started to escalate and she was screaming at me, telling me how she'd kill Lizzy and

not regret it, I didn't take it seriously at the moment, but a couple days after she went away from my home, Lizzy

called me and said that Leonina (yeah they knew each other a little) started a huge ass fight with her and that

she was hurt, wich caused me to immediately block Leonina on all my socials and cut contacts with her.

So, as the months went by, I started to realize, Leonina wasn't wrong on anything. Leonina wasn't ever aggressive

like those girls you see on WSHH vines and anything, she was just trying to defend the person she knew. And my

blind ass couldn't realize it. In fact, I only started to realize how Lizzy was draining my energies when I'd

spend days without doing anything and still feel tired from the amount of "i love you"s she'd send me every time

every day. She wouldn't let me do anything that wasn't related to her, she'd start arguments when my lunch time

at work was starting and then act like nothing happened. Not to mention the moments she saw me in a vulnerable

situation and instantly let me know that she saw me as a weak person who wasn't ever meant to be anything.

When it was my time to realize how bad things got, most of my best friends weren't talking to me. my family members

stopped inviting me to anything, my mental health was trash and... Lizzy was in a better shape than never. I

mean, if you consider snapchat filters to be a good shape, then yeah, she was better than me. So when I finally

got a grip on reality, I was told by Jennifer that Leonina didn't ever give up on saving me from Lizzy's claws

but that she wouldn't stop me from pursuing anything I thought would make me happy. And, a month after my birthday,

I got enough courage, and after an argument I had with lizzy, we finally broke up.

I called my best friends, asked them to help me out, and they all promptly accepted my apologies and helped me out,

wich I am still grateful to this day. Without my friends, I wouldn't be shit. And then, without telling Lizzy,

me and Leonina went to a cafe near our old hangout spot and she made me talk about everything that happened on

this relationship. Out of the 70 things Lizzy did, Leonina was shocked to discover that Lizzy once said that she

wouldn't regret killing our daughter if that meant that I'd stop giving her attention. As I kept telling Leonina

everything, her eyes would get bigger and bigger, and on the last second, she held my arms and said: You're

breaking up with her today. And I'm getting your phone too.

I was crying, I didn't know how to live outside of that relationship and I most certainly not know if I'd ever

be loved by anyone ever again. But after Leonina forced me to break up with Lizzy, I knew I was loved.

I broke up and spent nearly a week trying to get over these toxic circles I found myself in, and as time went

by, me and Leonina connected again and well, we're still dating to this day. And she doesn't prohibit me from

being my best version every single day.

If you ever get on a relationship with anyone, you should first analyze the person's behaviours and how that

person talks about other people in her circles. Lizzy said she didn't have any friends at all, always ran after

a man who didn't want her because of how annoying she was and never spoke good about her mother and father.

Moreover, always belittled my achievements and tastes on everything, wich then eventually linked to how insecure

she was about her appearence, she always made sure to make it clear that SHE wanted to be in a good position.

People without foundation often look for a relationship thinking that they're going to have a chance on being

controllative because they do feel the lack of control in their personal lives every single day. That alone is

enough to hurt their ego. People who always talk bad about everyone, almost always have a truth to hide.